Novel Bin Chapter 87: I'm Back
In the past, I couldn\'t understand people\'s hearts.
I believed everyone should live by rules, and that no value could surpass faith.
Rights were dispensable.
Duty was the meaning of life.
To maintain balance in such a harmoniously woven world, one had to keep that in mind.
But His Holiness the Pope, practically the Lord\'s representative, said:
"I hate to say this, but Harte is very different from ordinary humans."
"Those with baptismal names are inherently different from people in the outside world.""To some extent, yes. But we don\'t live lives where even our humanity is worn away. Especially for a child like Harte."
I tilted my head at His Holiness\'s words.
Did children and adults have different humanity? Or did it mean humans were beings whose humanity eroded as they grew?
When I was struggling to find an answer and keeping my mouth shut, His Holiness spoke:
"This is just my guess, but... I think Harte\'s sensibilities are closer to God\'s than human\'s."
"As a soldier serving the Lord, that\'s an honorable compliment."
"Oh no, it\'s not a compliment. After all, we\'re human and should live with human sensibilities, shouldn\'t we?"
"Is that so?"
"Of course. Because the ones Harte will interact with are humans, not God."
After hearing the explanation, I vaguely understood.
In other words, a person who wasn\'t human-like was like a foreign object in a harmonious world.
Then there was a need to correct one\'s humanity.
"Harte is exceptional in many ways. I suspect he has power unparalleled in human history. But I think that overwhelming divine name has deeply overshadowed his human name..."
"Does giving up my baptismal name improve my humanity?"
"Giving up? Let\'s not use such frightening words. Just sealing Harte\'s baptismal name should be enough."
"I\'ll follow Your Holiness\'s will."
"Hmm! Somehow it feels like I\'ve extorted more than prostration... but thank you for allowing it."
His Holiness placed his hand on my forehead. Then, he began the baptismal name sealing ceremony, infusing rainbow-colored divinity.
"When you wake up after a good sleep, the world will look different."
"Yes, I understand."
My eyes closed involuntarily.
The first sleep urge of my life seized my body and mind. Somehow, I didn\'t dislike this unfamiliar desire.
Thus, I fell into a deep sleep.
Later, when I woke from my slumber, it was the winter of my sixteenth year.
---
---
It was when I welcomed the spring of my eighteenth year. By then, I had witnessed the changed world as His Holiness said, and was finishing a gentle adaptation.
The sacred pond in the center of the temple still mirrored the blue sky like a mirror. And on the nearby spring-flowered lawn, a white-haired, golden-eyed woman wore an affectionate smile.
"Did you wait long? Erehite."
[Not at all. I was so excited waiting that I didn\'t even notice time passing.]
"R-really?"
[Yes. It\'s unusual for Harte to make a request. I was quite emotional in many ways.]
"Hmm..."
The divine dragon before me pretended to wipe tears with theatrical gestures. Her glib act was so unfamiliar that I chuckled despite myself.
[So, why did you ask me to wait here? I\'ve been curious the whole time.]
"I had something I wanted to give you."
[Oh my! I can hardly contain my curiosity. Let\'s have a look, shall we?]
Erehite was brimming with anticipation. Her exaggeratedly generous reaction made it burdensome to take out the item.
Still, I couldn\'t keep it hidden behind my back forever, so I carefully revealed the prepared item.
[My, this is... a bouquet?]
Erehite\'s eyes widened. Then she passionately thrust her beautiful pupils at me.
Thanks to that, I quickly opened my mouth. As if swept up by those golden eyes demanding an explanation.
"... It\'s white azaleas. A flower that\'s white and gold mixed, like Erehite."
[I know that. But why flowers?]
"I didn\'t know until now, but today is apparently a day to express gratitude to parents in the outside world. So I wanted to convey my gratitude to Erehite too."
[Am I Harte\'s parent?]
"Wet nurse... would that work? At least you\'re the one who took care of me..."
[Heheh, what\'s that... You\'re not even a noble.]
"Ugh. Forget it if you don\'t like it."
I tried to quickly retrieve the offered bouquet. But Erehite snatched the white azalea bouquet away with lightning-fast movement.
[Who said I don\'t like it? I\'m just touched that our Harte has grown up so well.]
"Don\'t say such embarrassing things..."
[By the way, since I don\'t see her with you, I guess Ibria doesn\'t have a gift for me?]
"Since this was prepared secretly... that could be the case."
[Tsk tsk, how disappointing. I guess it\'s true that raising daughters leaves you with nothing? I wonder how Harte grew up to be such a filial son while Ibria became an unfilial daughter? Usually it\'s the opposite, isn\'t it? The world truly is unpredictable.]
"..."
I kept his mouth shut, finding it difficult to agree with the slander against Ibria. Meanwhile, Erehite observed me at a loss for words and let out small chuckles.
[But you know what?]
"Hm?"
[About white azaleas. You\'re probably the only person who gives them as a gift of gratitude.]
"Why? I thought they were pretty, like Erehite."
[Pft, haha... That\'s certainly... a very, very... happy thing to say, but...]
Erehite continued, barely holding back laughter.
[But... white azaleas are mainly used for funerals, you know?]
"... What did you say?"
[Pfft... Anyway, I\'ll keep this safe and definitely use it at my funeral. Of course, I\'ll live hundreds of years longer than Harte, right? By then, not even Harte\'s bone dust will remain, right? Still, I\'ll make sure to be buried with this, thinking of it as Harte.]
"E-Erehite! Give that back, right now!"
No matter what, one can\'t give funeral-only flowers as a gift to express gratitude to a parent. Realizing my outrageous mistake, I immediately reached for the white azaleas Erehite was holding. But Erehite instantly reverted to her white dragon form through polymorph and flew away, escaping.
[I\'ll keep this fresh using my divinity, no matter what~. Harte~!]
"No, Erehite!!!"
[Ohohohoho.]
I fell to my knees and cried out without realizing it. But Erehite disappeared from sight, leaving only a mischievous laughter that stripped away all dreams and hopes.
"Please... please act your age... Erehite..."
Indeed, His Holiness\'s words were right.
Since sealing my baptismal name, I\'d come to feel various emotions.
Today, for the first time, I harbored resentment towards someone.
I didn\'t want to know such feelings.
... If possible, for the rest of my life.
---
---
If sealing my baptismal name was the first turning point in my life, the second came on my nineteenth birthday.
I usually stayed near the sacred pond, except during training and work hours. Sitting on the grass and blankly staring at the wide pond brought peace to my mind. Moreover, I could quickly forget the pain of the white azaleas that Erehite forcibly took away.
That day, I particularly wanted to view the pond up close. So I moved my feet to the immediate vicinity of the sacred pond as if entranced.
Right at that moment.
The ground I stepped on caved in, drastically disrupting my center of gravity. Moreover, it happened to be a sloping section, making loss of bodily balance inevitable.
An unexpected accident.
I ended up plunging my head straight into the pond.
Surely, it was a sight worthy of everyone\'s mockery.
But strangely, some memories flowed into my mind.
They were memories that shouldn\'t exist in this world.
\'This is... what on earth...\'
Broadly speaking, it was the life of a man who lived an alienated life and met his end in an accident at a young age.
\'Chaebol...? A concubine\'s child? Me...?\'
In the memories, I was a man born into an incredibly wealthy family. However, being an illegitimate child, I wasn\'t recognized as family and was left out. In fact, I was registered under someone else\'s name in the family registry.
That\'s how I lived, as if I existed yet didn\'t, until my untimely death.
Of course, in the process, I observed part of this world\'s fate.
I don\'t know everything, but somehow I\'m going to die.
Since it was an unfinished novel, I don\'t know the exact circumstances. Anyway, it was clear that if I didn\'t act, it would be too late.
\'It\'s a strange feeling...\'
Just having some memories of my past life flow in seemed to change part of my cognition. My past self, who often put on airs, started to feel somewhat awkward.
Above all, I became afraid of dying meaninglessly without knowing why.
That\'s probably why.
I unhesitatingly told Rupert, the Holy Knight Commander of the time, that I would quit.
Once I made up my mind, escaping was easy.
I left the temple, which I thought I\'d never leave in my lifetime, far too easily.
There was a sense of dissonance, but at this point, what\'s done is done.
That\'s how I began to defy my predetermined fate.
"Deoksun."
"That sounds like a girl\'s name."
"Deokgu."
"I\'ll just choose my own name. Yo."
I met the Third Prince Askalion... that is, Yulian.
"Yuliaaaan! What do you liiiiike? Random, game!!!"
"Ahem, wh-what... game...!"
"Tag!"
And I took in Tina, who really loves playing tag.
"Are you perhaps an angel...?"
"No, I\'m an orphanage director."
"What?"
Eventually, I saved Glen, who was destined to grow up to be a villain.
However.
Up to that point was just fine, but for some reason...
"As you can see, I\'ve got a kid."
"What!!!"
"Were you... prepared for this too?"
"Argh!"
...... One day, a villainess proposed a contract marriage.
When she thoroughly thrashed my back, I truly thought she lived up to her name as a villainess. But actually living and sharing time with her, I found Elphisia Luminel to be an incredibly good person.
Above all, she was so tempting that sometimes it was hard to resist.
What to do.
The more our daily life together continued, the more I felt like I\'d keep having bad thoughts.
Thoughts exactly opposite to the contract she proposed...
It took a long time to specifically name those thoughts.
Yes, it was when I clearly sensed the uncertainty of the future.
It was only when the demon attack occurred at the hunting festival that I clearly defined it.
Amidst such chaos, an old man blocked my path.
"Child who has twisted causality, I shall erase you and set right the providence."
Pong, torong, pong.
The sound of giant soap bubbles popping. As a sound similar to that of His Holiness spread, dark red bubbles materialized.
It was the High Priest\'s divine power.
The moment I witnessed it, my head started throbbing.
It was a headache similar to when I plunged my head into the sacred pond.
It felt like vast memories were rushing in like rapids of a river. Thanks to that, I felt like I would be crushed under the heavy mass of memories.
Receiving those mysterious memories, I engaged in battle.
Until I lost consciousness and collapsed.
Looking back now, I must have experienced a sense of déjà vu then.
The High Priest\'s divine power was that intense. After all, I had directly received the High Priest\'s divine power with my body.
Surely, memories etched into my flesh and soul must have been drawn out, I guess.
I lived a life full of regrets.
I experienced the reality of loved and cherished relationships slipping through my fingers like fine sand.
I don\'t want to lose them again.
I don\'t want to repeat this.
These mistakes, this future.
I intend to protect these fatefully intertwined relationships once again.
This time, I resolve in the name of the human called Harte.
That I will protect my precious world forever.
That\'s how I opened my eyes.
"... Ah."
Intense light poured down.
At the point when I had gouged out my own eyes, I hadn\'t hoped to see light again.
Was the world seen through eyes this moving?
I can see the relationships given to me now.
Three children and my one and only wife.
"Haha..."
I wiggled my finger at Yulian with my eyes narrowed.
Then Yulian hesitantly brought his head closer.
I flicked my finger against Yulian\'s forehead, giving him a forehead flick.
Thwack!
"Argh! Th-that hurts! Director!"
"Heh, hahaha..."
Yulian rolled on the ground as if having a fit. Completely throwing away his dignity as a prince, he sat there with tears in his eyes.
"That\'s more like it..."
I chuckled.
"What Askalion... you\'re just Yulian, exactly Yulian."
"Ugh...! Hitting me suddenly and then saying unfunny things...!!!"
I slowly shifted my gaze from Yulian, who was still clutching his forehead with reddened eyes, to one woman.
She wore an unsightly expression as if about to burst into tears at any moment.
Yet I didn\'t want to see such a face.
So I took the initiative to give her a gentle smile.
"I\'m back, Elphisia."
My one and only wife approached with quick steps and finally let a single tear drop.
"... You\'re late."
"I know."
"You\'re late... really."
"I\'m sorry."
Elphisia was still the same.
Still dazzlingly beautiful, and still adorning my world beautifully.
Feeling awkward about that fact, I made the mistake of repeating what I had said.
"... I\'m back."
Elphisia greeted me back with the same words, as if countering.
"So... you\'re late."
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